At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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