Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
