would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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