I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
