he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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