I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
