what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize