My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I think I sprained my soul last night
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
