Rock
Scissors
Fuck
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
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