it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
