I'm going to jail i love you
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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