This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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