She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize