That's when you crack a 10am beer
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
