I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
