White coat. Heels.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
