I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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