they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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