now i know why i became what i already was.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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