we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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