just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
