new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
