whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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