The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
