WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
