Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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