dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
