Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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