You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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