it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
