There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
