I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
