I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
