"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
