I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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