I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
