Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
