that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I will be naked everywhere
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize