There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Holy sore nipples Batman
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
