Dude my mom stole all your condoms
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
