The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
