Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
i believe in u and ur pee
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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