I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Where is the hickey?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
