On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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