my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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