i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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