We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
