Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
They are going to name an STD after you.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
