I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
