i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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